This morning, things didn't go per my plan last night.
Exhausted, I quasi-slept through three snooze hits on my alarm (one half-hour). Unable to even think about meditation before a cup of coffee, I grabbed one and sip-gulped it down so that at least I could get out with Love for our Awareness Walk. Both the coffee and the walk helped, and I was then able to slide onto my meditation cushion.
However, I was late after that, and there wasn't time to do an enso or set down for three long-hand pages of writing.
Perhaps Michael is right: maybe I am trying to fit too much into my morning. But upon coming home this late afternoon, I found myself exhausted and there's still so much to do. I wrote (which takes me about one half hour). I am also wondering: If I do Morning Pages in the afternoon, are they still Morning Pages or should I call them "Afternoon" or "Evening" Pages? Will the Julia Cameron police come after me for not doing them first thing?
So, what I found today is that I need to be a bit more flexible with myself. Michael also offered the suggestion of doing some kind of meditation/walking or writing while at work. The thing is, I don't have a planning period, and the half hour I do have for lunch is for...well, lunch. And sometimes getting things prepped for the afternoon, if I haven't already.
Bottom line, is I have a fairly grueling schedule. There is more space when I allow for more spaciousness. Meditation seems to work best for me in the morning, so I will just have to let other things move to later times if and when I need to. Major bottom line: coffee is a must! I don't care if I sound like a whacked-out caffeine addict. That's what I need in the morning, and it's the one thing I am just not willing to part with - especially while in the midst of all that I am in the midst with.
Richard Brown once said, "Reality is always richer than having a good time." Well, I am all for reality - definitely. I'm there every day. But my friend and creativity mentor, Jill Badonsky titled her one-woman show, "I Can’t Always Handle Reality, But It’s Really the Only Place to Get a Good Cup of Coffee." And, that about sums it up: the reality is, I need a good cup of coffee to help me jump start my day. It may be one of my best inner methods.
The Tolerance Muscle
2 months ago