There is Life After the Thesis

After chronicling my thoughts, feelings, ideas, and experiences throughout the thesis process on this blog (formerly entitled Rites of a Thesis), it seemed odd to me to simply let the blog go just because I had turned in my thesis and graduated. I don't want to merely "shelve" my thesis nor do I want all that I got from my time at Naropa to lie dormant. I want my thesis to continue to live and breathe and become, and I would like all the teachings and experiences I had during my time at Naropa to do the same. So I am keeping the blog (changing the title), and am commiting to myself to (w)rite on as I journey forward.

Monday, February 22, 2010

If at First You Don't Succeed...Stick with Coffee

This morning, things didn't go per my plan last night.

Exhausted, I quasi-slept through three snooze hits on my alarm (one half-hour). Unable to even think about meditation before a cup of coffee, I grabbed one and sip-gulped it down so that at least I could get out with Love for our Awareness Walk. Both the coffee and the walk helped, and I was then able to slide onto my meditation cushion.

However, I was late after that, and there wasn't time to do an enso or set down for three long-hand pages of writing.

Perhaps Michael is right: maybe I am trying to fit too much into my morning. But upon coming home this late afternoon, I found myself exhausted and there's still so much to do. I wrote (which takes me about one half hour). I am also wondering: If I do Morning Pages in the afternoon, are they still Morning Pages or should I call them "Afternoon" or "Evening" Pages? Will the Julia Cameron police come after me for not doing them first thing?

So, what I found today is that I need to be a bit more flexible with myself. Michael also offered the suggestion of doing some kind of meditation/walking or writing while at work. The thing is, I don't have a planning period, and the half hour I do have for lunch is for...well, lunch. And sometimes getting things prepped for the afternoon, if I haven't already.

Bottom line, is I have a fairly grueling schedule. There is more space when I allow for more spaciousness. Meditation seems to work best for me in the morning, so I will just have to let other things move to later times if and when I need to. Major bottom line: coffee is a must! I don't care if I sound like a whacked-out caffeine addict. That's what I need in the morning, and it's the one thing I am just not willing to part with - especially while in the midst of all that I am in the midst with.

Richard Brown once said, "Reality is always richer than having a good time." Well, I am all for reality - definitely. I'm there every day. But my friend and creativity mentor, Jill Badonsky titled her one-woman show, "I Can’t Always Handle Reality, But It’s Really the Only Place to Get a Good Cup of Coffee." And, that about sums it up: the reality is, I need a good cup of coffee to help me jump start my day. It may be one of my best inner methods.

1 comment:

Griffin said...

I call my pages "daily pages" then it doesn't matter when I do them... and I do them on the computer, rather than on paper... just 'cause...

I agree about the coffee before meditating... I do all my morning "getting ready" stuff, then sit down on the cushion just before walking out the door... keeps my brain from using the time to make "to do lists"...